8.21.2011

"Day of Hope"

Friday was "Day of Hope."
 I wouldn't say it's a day I celebrate, but rather observe. 
The ironic thing is that August 19th was my original due date for our last baby.
Friday was a little depressing, needless to say.

We have had two miscarriages and this website has really helped me heal and deal.
I do not know what our future holds, but I am choosing to believe that God will bless us with living children in His time.
Losing babies in the meantime does not make it easy to believe that truth, but at least I know that I can get pregnant.

Sometimes I can't help but think about our babies. 
I wonder what they would have looked like, if they were boys or girls  or one of each, and what their personalities would be like. 
While I wonder those things, I also know that they are alive and healthy and beautiful in Heaven.
I believe Jesus meets their every need and I feel certain I'll know exactly who my babies are when I get to Heaven someday.
And if you've suffered the loss of a baby or child, I believe you, too, will know yours as well.

Scripture (James 1:17) says that, "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows."
Truthfully, our babies and our children are not really ours. 
Our heavenly Father has been generous enough to trust us with such a good and perfect gift as a child.
So, why is it so hard to trust Him when/if He chooses to take that baby/child away?
It's hard. It hurts. But, I am trusting He has a better plan.
And if I had to choose someone to take my baby/child, it would most certainly be our heavenly Father.

I am so sorry to anyone else who has experienced the loss of a baby or child. In the womb or out. 
I only know the pain of losing a baby in the womb, and the pain was so deep and so intense that I could literally feel my babies being ripped apart from my insides.
I cannot imagine having a baby or child ripped from my arms.
I hurt for each one of you, and I pray that you may get your little bundle of joy safe and sound in your arms someday. I also pray that God would heal you from the inside out and use the loss to build your faith in Him.
I love that God answered Hannah's prayer in 1 Samuel 1:20: "I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him."
May He grant you what you ask of Him, too. 

9 comments:

  1. I cannot even imagine what you went through. I'm praying for you!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sweet, Cherish. My heart hurts for you in this. I have a sister who died before she was born and it's been something we've talked about since then. We wonder what she would have really looked like (nothing like the porcelain doll she was born as) or the kind of personality she would have. Holly would have turned sweet 16 this year. I don't think we will ever know "why", but I rest assured that I will get to hug that sweet girl one day. My living sister, Anna, will be 15 this year. Since the minute she was born she's had an undeniable spunk and she's so full of life. Since those first few years we've always said that she's not just living for herself, but she is living for Holly, too. I don't personally know the pain that you feel, but I do know what it's like to grieve for someone you never met. I have faith that you will be a wonderful mother one day. And I have a feeling they will be so full of life so that they can live for their big brothers or sisters, too. Praying for your sweet family tonight!

    ReplyDelete
  3. praying for you pretty girl :) god always has the right plan for us and all his children!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I didn't know that there was a day put aside for this. Sadly, my husband and I just had a miscarriage about a month ago. It was our first pregnancy and we were so thrilled to bring a little one into this world. I just have to keep my head up and know that God can see the bigger picture here. I understand your hurt. I will be praying for you and the many others who go through this same thing.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Cherish,
    You are such an amazing person and I am inspired by your faith and by the way that in the midst of your own grief, you are praying for peace for others who have had similar experiences. Prayers for you tonight!

    ~Tiffany

    ReplyDelete
  6. July 27th was our due date, and it was a rough day. I was so mad that I didn't even have a cemetery to go to even if I wanted to. A friend of mine shared this blog with me which has been great for me to normalize what I am going through. She does a great job putting words to the emotions of miscarriage. Sometimes I feel so alone in the journey of healing. *Hugs* http://theinfertilebird.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  7. What a tough time! I have to think back to just over a year ago when I found out I lost our first baby just before we broke the news to our parents on Monther's Day. Fast forward almost one year to the day and we were blessed with our Wyatt! I am so excited for what God has in store for you and Brandon. He is a mighty God and He has great plans for y'all! I know these instances are terribly hard and will not ever be forgotten, but I hope time heals your wounds.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Praying for you during a very hard time...I cannot even begin to imagine how emotionally painful a miscarriage is. I pray God blesses you and Brandon with many children in His time! <3

    ReplyDelete
  9. You are so sweet to think of others in your time of need. Best of luck to you I hope you get to tell your other children about their siblings in heaven soon.

    ReplyDelete

I sure do love hearing from y'all-you make my day!